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back at school [19 Sep 2007|07:44pm]
so back at school and all is well.
-it's been 16 days since i last saw rob and i really miss him but in a different way than I used to...it's not overwhelming me, but just gives me something to long for and look forward too. I still tlak to him everyday so the most important element is there. I guess sometimes I feel like i can be a baby complaining about missing him when people have husbands, boyfriends, wives and girlfriends away at war for months even years...so I shouldn't be too upset, but rather embrace what I do have here with me.
-new york city is surprisngly more enjoyable than it's ever been. I have really learned to take advantage of all it has to offer, and I hope to continue this behavior
-on a down note i havent had any time! with classes being superhard and work filling in the free time I do have, it's hard to do alot. I'm trying to get into somewhat of a routine, but we will see how that goes
-the herald square victoria's secret is great. i'm really learning alot about the company and business in general..you work on a much larger scale and a lot more closely with the best of the best. While some might consider me "just a sales associate" I deal with a lot more than most can imagine and this location is definately great exposure to a high pace environment where you always have to be on your game....and yes I have opened several angels cards already =)
-i feel comfortable with my decision to major in pysch and minor in comp sci. although there are times when i miss the realm of solely comp sci. i am still really involved with WinC (women in computing) and my web development class. One day who knows I might take classes to fill what I missed by the minor. but honestly there was no other way to slice it without feeling overwhelmed with mandatory (not to mention insanely difficult) classes


other than that...all is well and normal. love my new dorm and the location is fabulous! i couldnt ask for more, snaps for NYU here!

america's next top model is almost on! omg tyra is so crazy..can't wait!

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[13 Aug 2007|09:51am]
so it's almost that time, to go back to school. that is IF i go back. they still haven't processed my financial aid and won't return my calls. the bill is due today and they will drop me from my classes if i dont pay. these people are stupid. i dont know what their problem is. i'm really getting nervous. if i get dropped from my classes and they dont manually put me back in, it would be pointless to return this fall. i might as well wait until spring. but like wtf! nyu is so selfish that they can't even process a simple request of processing my financial aid. seriously seriously seriously. ahhh. well i'll try not to think about it b/c i'm sure it will all work out.
other than that. work at trumbull has been good but it's weird working with a different staff. i loved my old store so it's just not as cool.
rob is good. we have been doing alot this summer which is nice.
the fam is good. we went to six flags for alexas birthday. it was great.
alright that's it for now.

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long time since i updated... [17 Jul 2007|10:40am]
so it's obviously been a long time since i wrote in here. but honestly not too much has been going on. still working at VS. this is our last week of being open before the renovation, then next week we have to pack up the whole store. then i have to start travelling to work =( i haven't really done anything this summer so far. since i've been working so much and the weather is never very good, i just dont have anything to do. i would like to go to boston to visit kristina, but the reality of me getting a chance to get up there is slim to none. unless i go next week? i just am not sure, i have dentist next week, and quite frankly i dont think my car can make it up to Boston. i think im gunna see if she would like to meet up somewhere in between like misquamicut, or even like six flags. i just dont have the resources to travel much this summer. i hate being grown up and responsible lol. when i was younger summer was always vacations and travelling, not that i dont love summer still, it's just more serious.
speaking of work, that's where i have to go...now.
peace out.

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long timeeeee [23 May 2007|02:20pm]
[ mood | optimistic ]

so it's def  been awhile since i wrote in here. alot has been going on....
-i finished soph year of college!! craaazy! i ended up with all A's!!! how cool! i got one stinky A-, but it was in an honors section so that still prlly looks good on my transcript. i tried so hard anyways so if an A- was the  best i could get in that class then so be it.
-at work we have like all new managers. our new store manager is not as big of a sweetheart as sara was, but she still is nice. she is very policy and procedure which is good for our store. one of the comanagers is new. she's nice, she's growing on me.
-i haven't been able to spend as much time with rob lately because of our work schedules, but when we're together we have so much fun. i love him so much. seriously, i could not as for anything more!

i guess other than that not much has happened. it seems like a lot but maybe not really lol. i guess just transitioning into work mode from school/work mode is just a change of pace. the weather is starting to get better...so that's awesome!
i bought oc season 4 limited edition yesterday! so excited, i already watched some!
i also got the new maroon 5 cd...it's pretty good so far....
alright that's all peace!

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[07 May 2007|03:18pm]
[ mood | anxious ]

so i just had my LAST final. i'm done with soph year of college! that's friggin crazy. I think i got A's in all my classes except for calc. but i'm not sure yet, i didn't get any grades still! this is driving me nuts. no offense to the professors but you've had all weekend, for the most part, to grade these exams and give me a grade. i'm anxious to know! i reallllly would love to make Dean's List again! really it would make my month!
friday and saturday i'm substitute dance teaching at the studio! i love doing that! kids are great, dance is great.
thursday alexa has a chorus concert thing! i'm so excited! i love her and can't wait to watch her, she is too cute!
wedsnesday it's back to work. already a whopping 16 hrs in just a few days! that's crazy, but i do need the money so it's good.
arggg i need to clean up all my crap in my room. arg.

1 Wasted Away In Margaritaville *Take A Sip

[18 Apr 2007|02:19pm]
so i had an epiphany today. and i decided to focus and major in psych rather than computers...prlly minor in computers. i just get bored with it, psych actually interests me. and i realized i was focusing too much on "what will come out of this?" rather than "do i enjoy this?" so i am maturing and figuring my life out. yay!

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[15 Apr 2007|09:11pm]
seriously, group projects suck. my group sucks. how many times do u have to friggin email someone for just a gosh darn reply. seriously, i'm not doing this whole thing myself. and i will be telling my professor tmrw, because this is such bull. serious bull. are you serious? like this is college not day camp, let's get serious!

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housing [14 Apr 2007|09:26am]
[ mood | contemplative ]

so we got to do our housing selection yesterday. i mean i was expecting the worst since rising soph's have last pick b/c NYu is friggin gay and does crap like that. anywho sef and i picked a studio. it's pretty different from any of the dorms i've ever lived in, but the area is much nicer. it's like we don't have a living room and the kitchen is kinda in the bedroom. for those ofyou who reside in a city i'm sure you're well aware of the studio set up. it's not HUGE but it's not small. we do have 3 closets which is nice. but here is the best part, it's on 25th street. the area is sooo much nicer. well now i live in chinatown, so ofr course it would have to be better than that. it's a short walk to union square, and even the walk to campus is doable, but i think i'll take the bus or the subway. the subway is a little further than this year, it's prlly about a 1/2 mile which sucks. but i mean it's the real world. you don't always get the best. my room fresh year was amazing, so i mean i should have expected it to go down from there lol. which is NYU's gay way of doing things. kristina seemed upset about it but i really want her to room with me in the spring so i hope she doesn't change her mind. she reminds me most of myself, so like i derno i think i would really enjoy spending more time with her.
on another note, dance auditions were last night and i was a judge. all the girls were so cute. i thought everyone was really good. so basically we just had to divide the auditionees into groups. it was fun. it's always nice to see everyone. chel, coll, alisha, heidi, and sarah were there. it was cute. i'm goin back today at 1230 for an all day event of it.
the rangers better win today.
only 2 more weeks of school! like 9 days of classes! sweeeet. i love that!
peace out

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wow long time no write [12 Apr 2007|11:12pm]
[ mood | crazy ]

so it's been awhile since i posted in here. everything is really great. school is still so stressful but all of my grades are up and i've even had professors comment on my good performance. i have been trying to keep up with all my work and i tihnk i'm successful. so only 2 weeks left of school and then a few days of finals. it's crazy to think i'm already going to be a junior! for pete's sake i remember being a junior in high school like it was yesterday (ahh those days).
tmrw i choose my housing for next year and well let's hope for a better outcome than this year. i'm nervous at what's going to be left but i'm expecting the worst so that's a good mindset.
i pick my classes soon. as of now i'm a computer science major so i think i'm going to take data structures, discrete math, web programming and spanish in the fall. i am still debating whether or not i should do the honors section of data structures. i think it would be good for me. i didnt feel too overwhelmed by the honors section i'm in now so i might as well keep going with it. on top of that spanish meets on fridays. that is going to be so weird. i haven't had a friday class since high school. but i think i'm going to just start at the lowest level of spanish to get easy a's and i'm banking on skipping the fridays when i plan to go home. this seems like the best situation for me.
i plan on doing a lot of things different in the fall. i think i'm going to transfer to a different victoria's secret here in the city like the 34th street location. then i would work there and stay here more. i kind of am totally over any sense of homesick, sure i still miss rob and alexa at times but it's like i am better at coping with it and haven't gotten so much better at enjoying my current environment. i only want to go home once a month, then rob can visit me once a month. we would still see each other alot. and obviously i would still come home for long weekends and holidays. i just can't keep doing all this travelling, it was even more draining this year than last year. and when i wanted to stay here, for one reason or another i would end up at home.
this is a pretty long post but as the school year ends i just have a lot to do and a lot on my mind. especially with all the choices i have to make in the next few days like registering and housing. it's kinda crazy.

on another note...
kristina reminds me so much of myself. we talked for hours the other day and she is kinda going through the same thing with her boyfriend that i went through with rob last year, like the homesickness thing. she describes how she feels and i basically finish her sentences b/c i know exactly how she feels. it's really random, but i think it's kinda good for both of us because it shows me that i'm not the only person who thought like that and it shows her that i'm not like that anymore so she will gradually become more comfortable with the long distance thing. i'm going to miss her when she goes to madrid =(

ok this is soooo long...peace out

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[24 Mar 2007|10:46am]
sooo i really hate school. also group projects are the dumbest thing in college i hate friggin working on them. i'm so discontent right now with the workload i have. my calc test on thursday scares me more than a mass murderer...well maybe not but you get the idea. i hate this crap. i hate school, classes at school i mean. it's stupid. i just want to work, is that soo bad?! argggg i guess expanding my knowledge isnt so bad

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going crazy [06 Mar 2007|10:08pm]
[ mood | aggravated ]

so seriously, i'm starting to feel anxiety. the fall registration stuff was posted and like i have no idea what i want to take. i have no idea what i want to major in. i have no idea!!!!!! i feel so lost. i really friggin hate this. i'm like aimlessly taking classes. i don't want to commit to something b/c honestly there's nothing that i really want to do. yea the computers is easy for me and interesting but i hateee the way they run college math and honestly i dont know how much more i can take! psychology is always an option. i really want to sample the sports marketing which si what i originally came here for but nyu is so gay they don't know that undecided means UNDECIDED not Arts and Sciences! wtf. i want to sample something else! i dont know what to do. chaning my mind this late in the game would mean more time and money at this place. of course nyu would do something like that. arg! frustration is overwhelming me. i just don't know anymore. i just do not know! perhaps i should sacrifice lifetime happiness to meet my graduation requirements in the alloted time. works for most people right? why do i have to be so difficult?!?!!

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past days [24 Feb 2007|11:36pm]
[ mood | blah ]

yesterday brookie came in and we went shopping it was fun! i got 2 new eyeliners from sephoras and cute bunny boxers from gap. it was fun. we had the most expensive tgifridays ever for lunch! today i went to see grey gardens...it's on broadway...it was simply amazing. i wish i could sing so i could be on broadway. it's just such a rush to see live theatre b/c if they screw up they can't edit it. and like it's just nice. legally blonde is going to be a musical on broadway in april. i am def going to see it since that's like one of my fave moives. i really can't wait! i derno who i'll see it with but i dont care. i miss rob...alot. i haven't missed him THIS much in awhile. i think because school is stressing me and he's like my comfort zone. like my safe haven. i need to not feel so stressed. arg. just arg.

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blah blah [22 Feb 2007|03:18pm]
[ mood | apathetic ]

ok so calc really sucks. i'm so scared of it. literally i'm scared that one class will like ruin my life. it's not my fault the tests are so HARD! but i wish that like we at least had more than 2 effing tests. that's not how u teach math, with only 2 tests! i'm doing awesome in stats...A..and computer science...A...and topics...A...and calc well not even close. anywaysss i am so overwhelmed with work lately and i feel very unmotivated, i derno why. I'm trying really hard but I feel like burnt out from the amount of work that I don't have anything left in me. I don't really have a breather day. it sucks. i can't wait til summer time. seriously even when i'm working like disgusting hours at work I don't feel this drained. argggggg. well whatever, 2.25 more years of this lol. maybe i'll get a breather for spring break or something. ehh who really knows.
tonight is the season finale of the OC...i am going to ball. i am too obsessed with that show. but seriously...it's amazing. i have never missed an episode, except for one last year =( now it's over and repeats are only going to be on soapnet. i dont get soapnet. that really blows. well i guess my dvds will just get really used lol. arg. maybe it will get really good ratings and pull a 7th heaven. although this show is so much more worthy than 7th heaven. oh well, even when it goes I will never resort to the sex addict doctors who can't just go to work and do their job!

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overwhelmed [08 Feb 2007|01:17pm]
[ mood | aggravated ]

so calculus scares the crap out of me. i have to take it to continue with the computer thing. I really love programming and i understand calculus, i just can't understand the tests. it's like the the questions will have the most random variables in them and i just get confused. i can do it out just fine with no pressure. i dont think ever in the real world will i be asked to compute the limit of x cubed 4 x/ sin5x without a calculator and in like 5 minutes. first of all it just sucks. second of all it sucks. i dont want to build airplanes or anything, i just want to program. for pete's sake! anyways that aside. i hope i can do good in this class. i figured out that if i get at least b+ in all my other classes and a C in calc (which is what you need to continue and major) i can still get a 3.0 which is my personal standard for myself. and that is even a low one for myself. i just try so hard and to not do well sucks. who knows maybe i will get my test back and it will be an A however, i doubt it. but perhaps i should put a little more faith in myself. i derno it's all crap if you ask me. college is not the ideal way of learning. i should just build my own college where there is never tests you just get it or you don't. i hate that my understanding of a subject is based on a few example problems that are worth a whopping 10pts each and the exam counts for 30% of you grade! Which makes that one question worth 3 pts of your average! i'm sorry but that's stupid. arg i wish i could be rich from selling bras.

1 Wasted Away In Margaritaville *Take A Sip

progress [22 Jan 2007|05:30pm]
[ mood | chipper ]

so i'm getting back into the swing of things. i'm finding calc a little hard, but i'm working my butt off. computer class is fun, but it's moving a little slower than i'd like, but maybe that's a good thing. stat is easy so far. i switched out of my totitarianism (sp?) class to a dance and theater representation class, like analyzing performances and studying famous ballets. it's fun so far but already a lot of work. all in all classes are good. i miss rob, but it gets easier to say goodbye because it's like no matter what happens i know he's always there...ALWAYS! however, i do miss hugs and kisses =(
i treated myself to shopping the other day, and it was fab. i got a hot pink bra at vicky's i love it! i got a cute shirt from express, some makeup from sephoras. it was mostly gift cards i used so that's even better.
i filled out my internal transfer form and wrote computer science as my major, that makes me pretty nervous. it's like i've chosen. i have yet to submit it though. i still duno if i want to do a minor, i feel like it will be so much work since comp sci is a 48 credit major and most majors are only 32, so it's a demanding major. it will all depend if i test out of my language class. i should start studying to try to test out. Note to self: bring study guides back to school with me!!!! any free time i will use to work on that. it's important!
ok done thinking out loud
love yous!

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back to school [17 Jan 2007|10:35pm]
so school has been interesting so far. it's nice to find out that i made dean's list last semester, it's like still on my mind especially when i look at a syllabus and say to myself "god i can't do this" but i just remember how much work does pay off. so i'm gunna try really hard.
rob left me this morning it was sad but not too terrible becaues i have so much goin on.
i love my dance class! i just got back and i love it! it's so freeing.
i am very excited for Co. Dance.
i need new glasses.
lots goin through my he

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long time no write [10 Jan 2007|12:08am]
[ mood | content ]

so this break has been flying by. i love being home. i really do. even with having to work so much i just love being around my family and rob. i even like work lol. so i got my grades back from 1st semester and barely made dean's list with a 3.675 yay!! the important part is that i made it and that's 2 in a row. if i get 3 i get a special thing at graduation so i'm told.
next semester i decided to take the honors comp sci course. i am nervous but at the same time excited. i could really picture myself doing that as a major. i don't want classes to start though, i am dreading long hours of hw and studying. plus meghan ran off to italy =( i derno how it's gunna be without her there.
i can't wait for the summer. even though it's only january, i just hate school work. i don't mind work but i hate school work. it still feels to redundant to me. i need to feel like i'm productive in the world not just the classroom. i'm not talking philanthropy or anything but even being the top salesgirl at work feels more productive to me than spending days writing a paper about the constitution for a personal grade. i derno that's just how i feel.
oh well, i guess i should try to update this more but that's it for now.
toodles.

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lately [07 Dec 2006|04:41am]
so much has been going on. school is coming to a close, well at least for the semester. i have turned in one of two 12-20pg papers, did my powerpoint presentation, and took a comp programming exam. i don't have too much work left for the semester, just finishing up another paper and finals, and one more computer program.
i am excited about christmas, the more i think about it the slower time seems to pass, that really blows! i hope my gift for rob works out, it's not even final yet! this is so unlike me to be unprepared this late into the season! oh yea and i officailly caused the biggest christmas mishap known to man.
last week sam and i got in a blow out over something stupid that could have easily been solved by a simple "i'm sorry, can we look for your stuff later?" but whatever he threatend that I could never go back home when he was there, the words "dirty little cunt" were used as well as the "bitch" word and honestly i have never been so insulted in my life. especially from someone who poses as an authority figure in my life. whatever if things don't work out that's really not my problem and i have come to realize it's not my fault. my mom told me that my home is my home regardless. so i will be sleeping there tmrw night, i don't care. it's my house!
tonight i went to the new york rangers toy drive and i donated toys and got to meet Adam Graves, Hollweg, and Ortmeyer. It was amazing! I asked this lady behind me to take a picture of me and Hollweg. Hollweg said it was his and I quote "pleasure!" to take a photo with ME! lol. but the stupid ass lady didn't hold the effing button long enough so the red light came on but no picture was actually taken. ARG!!!!!!!!!!!!! that really ticked me off
oh well i'm gunna to to sleep now, just had to clear my head before bed....for once

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stressed [30 Nov 2006|10:44pm]
[ mood | stressed ]

feeling really stressed right now...here's why:
20pg final report
powerpoint presentation
12-20pg paper
psych final on the last day of class
computer programming assignments
.......i just wanna be done!!
i have been working like a beast lol. my 20pg report is almost done though =) prlly only 2 more hours! i wanna finish it tonight so i can start the other crap tmrw!
where are you vacation!

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paved paradise and put up a parking lot [16 Nov 2006|03:53am]
[ mood | thoughtful ]

-i might major in computer science, im really good at programming and, dare I say...it's fun
-i got an A- on my psych exam!(top 11%)! snaps for me!
-i get to see my rob tmrw!
-i'm sooo excited for thanksgiving....and xmas!
-i have felt swamped with work at school
-i have to register for classes tmrw and i'm reallyyy worried i wont get what i want =/

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